in a time when highlight reels of other people's lives carry the immense possibility of obliterating joy and inducing envy, it's really easy to just focus on the results. it's easy to hear good news and react like this: why do good things only happen to others? we lose sight of the grueling processes that people go through to achieve these results. we play ignorance to the fact that the friend who suddenly looks attractively fit is because they had been paying off the hours at the gym every single morning. we place all of our focus on the singular outcome that is seen by the eye. we subconsciously or consciously pretend that the people around us never had to go through stuff we do to achieve their wondrous results - whether it's scoring an A or getting to travel halfway across the world.
it's easy, so, i had to mentally slap myself this morning for focusing on the results.
empathy is an important tool in these situations. put yourself in the other person's shoes. experience what they've experienced to have come down to this single point. a gold medal was not earned from being happy and comfortable all of your days - hard work, pain, injuries, sleepless nights, emotional breakdowns, long chats about dreams and hopes and passion and desires, and more, are the ingredients to a gold medal. same to everything else. nothing just happens. everything comes in a process. be aware of it. your process will carry results too. you're just still in the process right now. focus on your process. give your best. your time will come. and even if it doesn't, acknowledge all of the lessons you've learned in the process and apply them to future processes. rinse and repeat.
2. breaking down big tasks into smaller ones. push yourself.
i went running/jogging/walking with my friends these evening. i had come home from church and was dozing off multiple times in the afternoon while i was typing on my phone. (literally nodding away and to the point of even almost dropping my phone) so i took a nap with incredibly restless sleep - i knew i was dreaming the moment i lied down. i woke up late to a number of missed calls from my friend, but pushed myself to get out of bed (in spite of being late) to go for that run anyways.
during the run, i knew i was not physically fit at all, so i ran for the first 1.5km and slowed down to a walk. halfway through, i was really tempted to give up and just walked the whole way. it was something i knew i could do. strangely enough, i began to set small goals for myself and pushed myself to go back to that slow jog anyways, however long i was able to keep that up. i was telling myself things like "if you could run to that bush, you can run to that streetlight. if you can run to that streetlight, you can run to that bench." every milestone was only a few steps away from each other, but i found it much easier to push myself like this than looking at completing a 4km run.
4km sounded big to me. running to the bench/street lamp/rocks was not. small tasks and goals work. just keep doing the little things and soon, you'll realise that you're getting big things done.
(i completed the run with a lot of hiccups and pauses in between, switching from running to jogging to walking to jogging and walking again, but i made myself finish it nonetheless. bonus: having supportive friends really help too.)