Christmas, don't come now.

my mind is in a very conflicting state right now. as much as i can't stop it, a part of my mind doesn't want Christmas to come. because Christmas nearing means i have less time to finish my assignments, prepare for presentation, brainstorm gift ideas, organize a Christmas event--just, stuff. stuff to do. a long list of stuff that i wish i don't need to do but obviously would have to complete. 

i sometimes still do curse my strong dependence on sleep and my inspirational moments that usually only happens in the night. why, oh why? my body desperately needs sleep, but my mind is wide awake with all these thoughts, these crazy thoughts. 

there's so much to do, but here i am, writing things that aren't even related or helpful to my assignments. well, it certainly helps my soul to calm down. 

advice for myself in the following weeks :

1. go to bed on time. do not spend extra nonsensical time on the internet staring at news feed refreshing itself. if you're spending more time awake, be productive. read. draw. write. watch a movie, even. just don't go to Facebook and drown your sorrows in it. it doesn't work that way.
2. attend classes and listen. take notes. stop giving yourself excuses to skip classes or tutorials, no, not even those that's about to happen on Friday nights. 
3. spend less time on Facebook and Instagram. spend more time listening to music. 
4. keep your momentum going. get enough rest but also don't slack. keep filling yourself up with stuff. 
5. pray. talk to God. listen to God. read the Bible. pray again and again and again. (this shouldn't be just for the following weeks, but for a lifetime)
6. stop asking your friends out. starve a few nights. you're not going to die. 
7. ask questions about stuff that you don't know or don't understand. be brave. be bold. and think. think a lot.

but oh, don't come just yet.

Christmas would mean rest, but it would also mean the end of all my deadlines and tests. 

keep me, Jesus. keep me near.